Beliefs about the opposite sex?

[Deb]

I should probably start a new topic/thread I feel is slightly related to this one: beauty standards for women. When I was watching a couple of YouTube videos tonight I came across quite a few on women who have had loads of plastic surgery to make themselves look like Barbie (nope, there isn't just one). There don't seem to be such pervasive standards directed towards men. I'd love to get to the bottom of that—why women?

It's hard to imagine the plastic surgeons actually will do what they've done to these women. One had 6 ribs removed so she could get her waistline down to 14". Sad.

[BethAnne]

I fold.   
I truly do respect an individual's need/right to express themselves how ever they wish.  Hell, I grew up in the 60's. 

Now I do not mean disrespect with this video at all.  Horses.  Eagles.  I understand that the motivation is NOT the same.  I wonder tho, what dressing up as a horse satisfies her?

[BethAnne]

[Deb]

Now I do not mean disrespect with this video at all.  Horses.  Eagles.

Yes, entirely different things.
With the NAs (not them exclusively), there is a reverence and symbolism with dressing like animals, steeped in tradition, respect, ceremony. The Pony Play girl? Not sure where that comes from. I can say when I was about 4 or 5 (I've been a horse lover since birth, horse lovers are stable people, lol), my friend and I used to stuff weeping willow branches down our pants, pretending we were horses and they were our tails. But at that age, brain wave levels are near hypnotic state and the lines between reality and imagination are delightfully fine.  And we grew out of it. But maybe Pony Girl saw an image of a magnificent horse when she was a child and in that vulnerable mental state, something stuck. IDK, I'd love to know more about all the people on the My Weird Obsession show, what that's all about. Watching pony girl my first thought was: wow, that bit must be doing a number on her teeth. The second was, when I had my horse I bought him a bit-less bridle because he hated having a bit in his mouth. (Story here: Gallop Intentionally) The headstall/bit she had was not cheap and pretty heavy duty.

I picked up The Early Sessions Book 1 the other day and made a nice dent in it. I've started highlighting text for a new topic on Seth's sense of humor (love that) and some interesting things about the relationship between the entity (or over soul) and it's splinter personalities. One of the questions Rob asked was do people incarnate as animals (that would have been a guess for me with Pony Girl), but Seth said not directly. So... to each his own. And a mystery to me.

[BethAnne]

[BethAnne]

One of the questions Rob asked was do people incarnate as animals (that would have been a guess for me with Pony Girl), but Seth said not directly. So... to each his own. And a mystery to me.

I just watched a Bashar video that our pets are given an opportunity to evolve into humans when we interact with them and help them develop a personality.  I'm sure you have had horses who "communicated" with you.      Maybe Pony Girl was a horse right before this??

[John Sorensen]

I should probably start a new topic/thread I feel is slightly related to this one: beauty standards for women. When I was watching a couple of YouTube videos tonight I came across quite a few on women who have had loads of plastic surgery to make themselves look like Barbie (nope, there isn't just one). There don't seem to be such pervasive standards directed towards men. I'd love to get to the bottom of that—why women?

It's hard to imagine the plastic surgeons actually will do what they've done to these women. One had 6 ribs removed so she could get her waistline down to 14". Sad.

The extreme surgery crowd to me seems to be a mental disorder.
I don't know any man that finds that freakish barbie lady the least bit attractive.
To me it's also unethical for people to perform unnecessary plastic surgery to enable someone's mental illness.

[BethAnne]

To me it's also unethical

Exactly, but there is always someone willing to do the unethical for $$$ abundance.

[John Sorensen]

To me it's also unethical

Exactly, but there is always someone willing to do the unethical for $$$ abundance.

Maxwell Maltz was a plastic surgeon who found that people with self image issues were still all!fucked up after the surgery. That had not healed the psychic scars.
He went on to publish a book called Psycho-Cybernetics that recommends the same exercises you will find in the Seth material.
I used both methods, I used to feel terribly ashamed about my body.
Once I resolved those psychic scars I never had those sorts of issues again.
It saddens me to see people trying to fix themselves but utterly falsifying their personal reality with erroneous methods that leave them more miserable.
Try suggesting to someone that their own mind is their best medicine and people will think you are  willy wonka on acid.

[BethAnne]

So is a naked Kim K empowering women as she says?

[John Sorensen]

I have no idea.
The vapid shallow and pointless antics of the world's most annoying celebrity make it hard for me to see her as spirit or God.
Now if I am God for day, I would make it so that I forgot forever anything to do with Kim k. Buttt then that is not very loving nor inclusive is it.
Oh what a moral dilemma.
I'll have to be content with my books whenever my girlfriend watches those stupid stupid shows!

[Deb]

So is a naked Kim K empowering women as she says?

Whaaaatttttt? Too many people lying to themselves. Working out their own dramas and escalating need for constant attention (as they say, there is no such thing as bad publicity [except your own obituary]). Trying to convince themselves that whatever the hell they're doing is for the common good. How noble.

Not to brag, but I'm very good at giving readings.

Some day you'll have to read me. I've never put much faith into cards, astrology, etc. but recently and on the recommendation of a trusted friend I had my chart read and it was so spot-on that I still can't believe it. I have always felt, however, that people who do readings like this are very intuitive, tapped in, so have not completely discounted the tools they use.

[BethAnne]

Some day you'll have to read me.

I would LOVE to!
I start out by having the person ask "What do I need to know?  What does God want me to know?"  And have them pull three cards.  Often the whole thing takes 10 min and they are blown away.

The cards never lie....but not everyone can interpret.  The cards after thousands of years are an archetype.  Anything that is so focused upon by so many for so many years  "holds" energy. 

[James]

Seth had rather a lot to say about sexuality, both in reincarnational terms and in terms of gender identity within a given life. Here are a few excerpts from my files on reincarnation and sexuality (I apologize for the length of this post - skip it unless you're highly interested):

Seth:

An excess of male lives will turn a personality sour in a feminine manner, without the inner understanding and compassion that is usually associated with the female sex. In like manner consistent female personalities will turn harsh without the inner strength usually associated with the male sex. For this reason most entities live lives as male and female.
Sex, regardless of all your fleshy tales, is a psychic phenomenon, merely certain qualities which you called male and female. The qualities however are real, and permeate other planes as well as your own. They are opposites which are nevertheless complementary and which merge into one. When I say as I have that the overall entity is neither male or female, and yet refer to various entities such as Joseph and Ruburt, which are definitely male names, I merely mean that in the overall essence the entity refers or identifies itself more with male characteristics, or so-called male characteristics, than with the female.
The seeming dominance of the male in earthkind is merely because the aggressiveness of male personalities makes itself known quicker, and often with a vehemence. The basis however is very strongly female, since without the giving quality the aggressiveness would be but a stationary closed fist, incapable of motion and incapable of unfolding into other lives, as it must. The aggressiveness is a thrust for life and action against inertia, but without the acquiescence of the female quality, life would not open.
- SESSION 12, JANUARY 2, 1964

======================================================

However as you have probably supposed by now, change of sex and race is the usual as far as continuing existences on your plane are concerned.
As a rule each entity is born so that he experiences at least three roles, that of mother, father and child. I make three roles rather than two because a complete childhood, for example at least once, is usually necessary so that a personality can experience the knowledge of human growth.
-Session 23

===============================================
You are not only male or female as you know, but both, with one temporarily predominating. Almost (underlined) without exception, there are male and female lives either in your past or future.
- SESSION 291, OCTOBER 5, 1966

Far be it from me to give either Ruburt or yourself swelled heads, but in your cases we see the male and female aspects well-balanced, one of the reasons why this is your last incarnation. These elements are highly unstable and each personality works them out.
You have the impulse to think of the male as disciplined, yet the raw male elements are unthinkingly aggressive, and the raw female elements are indiscriminately creative.
- SESSION 441, OCTOBER 9, 1968, ES9, pp. 104 – 106

==========================

Physically speaking, you would have no males or females unless first you had individuals. You are each individuals first of all, then. After this, you are individuals of a specific sex, biologically speaking.
You have categorized human abilities so that it seems that you are men or women, or women and men primarily, and persons secondarily. Your personhood exists first, however. Your individuality gives meaning to your sex, and not the other way around.
- SESSION 765, FEBRUARY 2, 1976 9:23 PM MONDAY

=============================================
You stress the importance of sexual identification, for it seems to you that a young child must know that it will grow up to be a man or woman, in the most precise of terms — (louder) toeing the line in the least particular.
The slightest deviation is looked upon with dismay, so that personal identity and worth are completely tied into identification with femaleness or maleness. Completely different characteristics, abilities, and performances are expected from those in each category. A male who does not feel himself fully male, therefore, does not trust his identity as a person. A woman doubtful of her complete femininity in the same manner does not trust the integrity of her personhood.
A lesbian or homosexual is on very shifting psychological ground, because the same interests and abilities that they feel most personally theirs are precisely those that mark them as sexual eccentrics.
These are simple enough examples, but the man who possesses interests considered feminine by your culture, who naturally wants to enter fields of interest considered womanly, experiences drastic conflicts between his sense of personhood and identity — and his sexuality as it is culturally defined. The same, of course, applies to women.
What you think of as lesbian or homosexual activity is quite natural sexual expression, biologically and psychologically. In more "ideal" environments such activity would flourish to some extent, particularly before and after prime reproductive years.
Lesbianism and homosexuality, as they are currently experienced, also represent exaggerated versions of natural inclinations, even as your experienced version of heterosexuality is exaggerated.
SESSION 768, MARCH 22, 1976
9:43 P.M. MONDAY
==============================================
The love and cooperation that forms the basis of all life, however, shows itself in many ways. Sexuality represents one aspect, and an important one. In larger terms, it is as natural for a man to love a man, and for a woman to love a woman, as it is to show love for the opposite sex. For that matter, it is more natural to be bisexual. Such is the "natural" nature of the species.
Now: Heterosexual love is one important expression of bisexuality, and sexually represents the reproductive abilities. Heterosexuality, however, rests upon the bisexual basis, and (intently) without man's bisexual nature, the larger frameworks of the family — the clan, tribe, government, civilization — would be impossible.
Basically, then, man's inherent bisexuality provides the basis for the cooperation that makes physical survival, and any kind of cultural interaction, possible.
Tendencies toward lesbianism or homosexuality in children are quite natural. They are so feared, however, that often just-as-natural leanings toward heterosexuality are blocked. Instead, the young person is stereotyped.
I am not saying that lesbianism and homosexuality are merely stages leading to heterosexuality. I am saying that lesbianism, homo¬sexuality, and heterosexuality are valid expressions of man's bisexual nature.
I am also stressing the fact that love and sexuality are not necessarily the same thing. Sex is love's expression, but it is only one of love's expressions. Sometimes it is quite "natural" to express love in another way. Because of the connotations of the word "sex," however, it may seem to some of you that I am advocating a promiscuous sexual relationship with "no holes barred" (smile). You may delete that.
The great human qualities of love, strength, compassion, intellect and imagination do not belong to one sex or the other.
(11:13.) Only an understanding of this inherent bisexual nature will release those qualities in each individual, regardless of sex.
SESSION 769, MARCH 29, 1976 

[John Sorensen]

While I'd love to some travel eventually, part of the reason it is not really important to me is whenever I read some history about a particular country or region of the world I can feel that I've already been there, several times.


Lately I've been intentionally trying to recall some more nastier personalities. Focusing on the only the nicer ones seems a bit one sided.
I started picking up some weird numbers one day during a light alpha state as I lay on my bed.
I felt like writing down the numbers on a bit of paper, so I did. Then I started writing them in different sequences, and adding them together, seeing if any patterns had a feeling to them. Some of the numbers related to my birthdate.


Anyhow, I came up a number, sort a reference to a year/period, then out of the blue I got the feeling of some type of Spanish Monk. Not the nice ones. Like when the Spanish invaded Mexico and just started destroying the people and their culture.


I even found a reference to a specific personality who wrote a book about the "savages" and how he was personally responsible for destroying many religious and totem-istic objects and information that was part of the culture. Which also included ritual human sacrifice of course.


Anyhow, I don't know if I am related to this unpleasant fellow, or just started picking up on his world view, but he was a righteous bastard, who was genuinely religious but also just doing his job in  way - like many of the religious zealous types are - he believed 100% in what he was doing was actually good for the people whose lives were affected by him.

[Wren]

 

The seeming dominance of the male in earthkind is merely because the aggressiveness of male personalities makes itself known quicker, and often with a vehemence.

I've often wondered about male dominance in most cultures and why this is so.
Seth's words on personhood ring so true. I'm aware that some of my mental characteristics would normally be perceived as 'male' and I lack certain female preoccupations (families, children), yet these are balanced with other 'female' things. Most of the time I think of myself as a person, and then a female. I don't know how common this is.

[Wren]

 

So is a naked Kim K empowering women as she says?

Whaaaatttttt? Too many people lying to themselves. Working out their own dramas and escalating need for constant attention (as they say, there is no such thing as bad publicity [except your own obituary]). Trying to convince themselves that whatever the hell they're doing is for the common good. How noble.

'Except your own obituary' 

[BethAnne]

Anyhow, I don't know if I am related to this unpleasant fellow, or just started picking up on his world view, but he was a righteous bastard, who was genuinely religious but also just doing his job in  way - like many of the religious zealous types are - he believed 100% in what he was doing was actually good for the people whose lives were affected by him.

I've picked up on a life as an Inquisitor and felt that "duty to God".  I realized I learned a lot from that and it made me more understanding  to fundamentalism whether political or religious.  I can "remember" standing outside the dungeon waiting for the prisoner to comprehend God and gain salvation.  Instead, I was shaken to the core at how I was responsible for this persons destruction.   I feel I've met several of my "victims" in this life who hated me on sight.

I feel balanced as a person and see myself fairly well without a sexual filter...but I'm usually the most "male" and the most "female" person in the room.  So it's probably no wonder I find this guy very sexy.   

[Deb]

I feel balanced as a person and see myself fairly well without a sexual filter...

Ya know, I'm so sick and tired of gender roles. I just do what I need to do, when I need to do it. I'm 100% female (at least in this incarnation) but not according to modern standards. I'm 100% attracted to men. But I am not defenseless or helpless (same thing). I am dexterous, handy, independent, mechanically inclined. But also nurturing, a healer, loving, soft and tuned into what other people need. Sexy is always changing for me. The best I can come up with is "smart is sexy" and then beyond that is fair game.

[Deb]

I've often wondered about male dominance in most cultures and why this is so.

You know what? Me too. I know there were cultures in the past (Egypt first comes to mind) where women were respected and revered. I'm totally female, but never have been a girly girl. Not into pink, designer anything and don't fuss when I break a nail. I've always just been just—me. A human first, always rising to the occasion, whatever it is. I remember being young enough to not be gender conscious. I imagine it's more common than admitted, too many people buy unwittingly into the commercialized version of how we are supposed to be. Just recently I've had a couple of friend/acquaintances tell me that all they've EVER wanted in their lives was to be a wife and mother. I was stunned/shocked/horrified, because that had never occurred to me.

I do have a son. I never wanted to be a mother (when I was a child I learned about the child birth process and it totally scared me off, not to mention that I never felt I had what it took to be a proper parent), but there came a day when the hormones overtook me and I changed my mind. I love my son more than I could ever imagine love, and have never regretted my decision. Well, maybe a little bit when times got rougher than any normal human could withstand. But yes, I also think of myself first as a person/human, and then as a female. You are not alone. It's just that you will rarely hear that. Just assume it.

[BethAnne]

This is why men are confused and women are crazy!



Two of the most beautiful women of the world.

Would you recognize these gals without make up?

[BethAnne]

"What is it that makes an older woman sexy?
First of all, it's how a woman inhabits her body. No matter the size or shape — is it her temple? Does she treasure it? Is she proud of it? Does she own it? A woman who owns her body, is just damn sexy..."
http://ourreinventiongeneration.com/2729/what-makes-an-older-woman-sexy/#.VvHtnSPnbIU
5 Things Young Men Find Sexy about Older Women
http://www.care2.com/greenliving/5-things-young-men-find-sexy-about-older-women.html

62

[John Sorensen]

I've always found women (at whatever age) more attractive without make up. Make up actually turns me off. If people want to wear it, I don't give a shit one way or another, as long as I don't have to wear it's something I even really think about. But there are so many ridiculous social pressures on women to conform, far more than for men when it comes to grooming etc.


Nothing wrong with good hygiene, or dressing up, looking nice or whatever. But people should do something because they choose to, not out of conformity.

[Deb]

This is why men are confused and women are crazy!

No kidding, I've seen those types of photos before, with and without makeup. And then there's Photoshop to fix whatever can't be fixed with paint. Women are so burdened with the standards our society has put on us as far as our outward appearance goes. Not fair! And no relief in sight as far as I can tell.

"What is it that makes an older woman sexy?
First of all, it's how a woman inhabits her body. No matter the size or shape — is it her temple? Does she treasure it? Is she proud of it? Does she own it? A woman who owns her body, is just damn sexy..."

I have a friend who is almost 50. She's very attractive, sexy, dresses on the showy/revealing side, walks like she's entering a stage. When we get together I become invisible, but I enjoy watching people react to her. It's not my style so I find it educational and entertaining. She's been dating a 35 year old man for a couple of years and younger men tend to be attracted to her. [Truthfully, all of them do.] Not too long ago she said she was done with younger men, but then this last time we got together she mentioned a 20-something guy who is in her life right now.    So these photos and links were good timing!

I guess it all depends on what a person is looking for:

"These men are open to relationships, they just don't want that long-term commitment and family responsibility. So you offer him a great opportunity for companionship and romance without the pressure of wanting to get married."

"You don't mind a little romantic distraction and feel flattered and enlivened by a younger man's attention. Yet, you recognize that your relationship is not as likely to last long-term."

All is fair...

[BethAnne]

GREAT new photo Deb!  You got it going on!

Most of the guys I've dated have been younger than me.  It worked for me because I had so much else going on I didn't want a commitment.  I wasn't looking for a New Daddy for my kids and the occasional date was kept private from them for the most part.  Because commitment/long term wasn't factored in other reasons for hanging out  were explored.  While I can dress up my style is GirlyGirl TomBoy. 
This is just my opinion but if you have to bob your tits in someone's face to get their attention you are lowering the bar no matter what your age.  I believe it is time to redefine/rediscover women.  To me confidence, intelligence, kindness, attitude, power and a touch of vunerability is sexy no matter age or gender.

Mimi Kirk is 71+ and promotes a vegan lifestyle.                                     Annette Larkin is 70 year old bodybuilder

[Deb]

GREAT new photo Deb!  You got it going on!

That was me in Sarasota (my old stomping ground) in August, my happy place. Quite a bit different than today! I felt the need to mix it up, me on Joe the horse will probably reappear when the weather gets better.

This is just my opinion but if you have to bob your tits in someone's face to get their attention you are lowering the bar no matter what your age.

Some women have learned what works, I guess. For attention, lots of it. Or learned to use the tools given to them, lol. 

Hey, are you getting any of this snow down there? This is my back yard, that's a 6' fence. The other photo: there's a chicken coop under there somewhere. Trying to get the courage to check their water supply. It's still coming down, no signs of stopping. It's so windy that every window on my house, N S E or W, is caked with snow. And it was 73° yesterday. Springtime in the Rockies, yee hah!

Hey, I just noticed this thread has been read 666 times.

[LenKop]

I find the mass waves of social acceptance very interesting, and it's quite evident throughout history in terms of gender roles.

If we look at the stage for one, in Shakespearan times men would play female parts, make-up and all. To the classical portraits in times where women who, by todays standards would be considered overweight, but at the time the skinnier we were the more poorer we were considered.

I also think men need to find their way in this modern age too.

We have no right of passage. At the least, when a girl turns a certain age, there is an obvious change physically, with the monthly cycle beginning. Boys changes are more subtle. And also our roles as breadwinners, having changed so much, with females in the workforce, I think men need to open themselves up and look within in order to adjust in the current paradigm.

LK

[John Sorensen]

Most of the men (or Manchildren) from my generation  (I was born in 1980) had fathers who were never around, and most of my friends and I growing up had divorced parents.


So many men of my generation simply did not have strong male role models in their lives. If you don't have a role model, you don't have something to imprint on.


That's the natural order of things. It's not like a young kid can go "Alright, my father isn't around, get me some Rocky movies, I need a role model here".

[BethAnne]

Deb...I used to live in St. Pete.  What I would give to be on the ocean right now!
I don't have a TV so didn't realize what was going on up in Denver!  (Or Brussels for that matter)  OMG!!  No snow but chilly wind. 

LenKop...what a thoughtful post!   I totally agree about men not having a right of passage.  Having raised 2 sons, one 32 and the other 42, they have been very confused people.  I don't know what it would take in our society for that to change.   
If you have any other thoughts on this please post.

John...your post came in as I was typing.  Made my heart swoon as I'm sure that was what was going on with my sons.    They are very in touch with  their feminine side but the older son pushed against that by being pretty macho, which is now not working for him.  Both of my guys are great parents though and seem to be healing as they raise their sons.

[John Sorensen]

Yeah I can say that I was overly-feminine and under developed in the masculine as I grew up.
I have to also wonder how much of that is natural for me though, as I'm more intuitive that most other men I have met.
In my twenties I did some stuff like martial arts, strength training and working in a blokey factory environment where I got to be around "real men" , you know like your John Wayne types and for me that was healthy.


Ironically now I get told by people "he's so manly" etc, but it wasn't always that way. It really took a lot of work to balance out the polarities of masculine /feminine in my psyche. Readings works of Carl Jung helped a lot, as he gives a model for this sort of stuff. Numerous times I've had gay men tell me they find me attractive, and that sort of thing has never bothered me, I mean it's flattering and all - but I do wonder if is that being in touch with both the masculine and feminine in me that people are attracted to?


I really don't know. I can also be irrational and angry and somewhat bi-polar when I don't exercise and meditate, which makes it very difficult for people to be around me in those times. I think that goes along with that creative thing, you know the cliche of the crazy artists. From my perspective it's like I'm plugged in to the material world about 60%, and 40% to the non-material world of ideas, or Framework 2 if you prefer.
What keeps me from getting overloaded and exploding is meditation. Otherwise it's like running too much voltage through my body, just too much energy and information.


Like a computer that is always connected to the internet, ideas and information come to me whether I want them to or not. And it can be overwhelming. Which is why I write and do other stuff just to let some of the damned ideas out of my head, to give me some peace!


If I was not a voracious reader, I think I would still be quite lost, as I get most (practical) ideas when reading, and then try them out in my mind first, and then in the actual world.

[BethAnne]

I've had similar conversations with my younger son who is an artist.  Gay guys hit on him all the time while the older son is finally getting out of his face cars/fast women phase.

Do any of you guys see this time of being raised mostly by women as a cultural balancing?  Fathers in the 50s were about as animated as an end table.  I was aware as a kid that my father was unusually egalitarian, but still I think he felt uncomfortable interacting with his children.  It was unheard of for fathers (in general) to do women's work and kids were in the Mom Box.  Now my younger son and daughter try to live the "Father Knows Best" lifestyle to compensate for their father being 90% gone.

[BethAnne]

This is a sweet series.

[BethAnne]

[BethAnne]

Joe Rogan talks Man Stuff

[BethAnne]

[BethAnne]

Rain Dove....Androgynous Model

[BethAnne]

[Deb]

Thanks for all the videos Beth Ann! I've watched the androgynous ones, very interesting stuff. Mind bending. And why not? There are so many different types of people in the world, each one unique and valid in their own way. Power to them for having the strength to be themselves and not cave to convention.

Open the mind, open the heart. No judging.